High-status sellers don’t just qualify opportunities—they qualify buyers. Not every prospect deserves your time, trust, or effort. Prospects lie. They ghost. They exploit your expertise without intention to buy. As Tom Manning of Pathway Academy told me, “Teach your salespeople to disqualify prospects rather than assume everyone deserves help.” 

It's a mindset. Pivot from “winning every deal” to focusing on qualified, deserving buyers.

Walking from a $580k deal

We flew halfway around the world to close a $580K deal—then walked away.

Gal Aga, CEO of Aligned, tells the story like a scar he earned:

“We’d spent months navigating an endless Proof of Concept (POC). Three exhausting extensions. Four scope changes. Two surprise stakeholders. We got the technical win.”

But getting everyone in one room to close? That was supposed to be the easy part.

“We were inches away. Just needed X, Y, Z, and it’s done.”

They return, ready to close.

The VP says: “Sounds great. Let me just speak with my COO, briefly.”

"We walked into the COO’s office. He smiled: 'Sit, relax, you must be tired.'

He was warming us up before the kill shot.

We stood, signaling urgency. We weren't here for games.

Still smiling, he says:

'Thanks for coming all this way. We're close to making a decision. But, you know, this is expensive. And given how challenging the POC was, we'd need an opt-out clause if the tech doesn't deliver. Or at least a significant price cut. I’m sure you understand.'

Close to making a decision?

More asks?

At that moment, I finally saw clearly—the deal was dead. This wasn’t partnership. It was exploitation."

They walked out of the COO’s office without a deal.

And honestly? Losing never felt so good, Gal recounts.

Walking away: A high status move

Gal Aga offers three signs it’s time to walk:

1. Endless POCs with no firm commitments
2. Last-minute demands signaling exploitation
3. Buyers who say, “You’re the vendor—dance for me”

Salespeople talk about qualifying the solution. But very few qualify the partnership.

“Do they respect your time? Are they aligned internally? Do they want you to win, or just want you to fold?" asks Matt Green, CRO at Sales Assembly.

“Too many sellers think a POC means progress. But from the buyer’s side? It can mean stalling, testing risk, or proving you’re just filling a column," says Ayanle Soffé, an Enterprise Sales Rep.

Sometimes, the best close is the door on the way out.

Yes... then vanishes

David Klasser of Exploding Leads knows that feeling too well.

He met with a prospect three times. Spent over three hours. The prospect verbally committed.

“Send me the agreement,” he said.

Six days later: crickets.

Follow-up emails? Blocked.

Phone calls? Blocked.

Eventually, a final message arrived:

“There is no need to elaborate. Please remove me from all of your marketing lists.”

David had turned down three other prospects to prioritize this one. “I trusted a verbal agreement. And I got burned,” he said.

5 signs it's time to walk 

Look, protect your time, energy, and sanity. Yes or yes? Qualify the buyer, not the deal.

Here are five signs that scream: walk away.

1. Endless movement, no momentum

You’re demoing. Meeting. Whiteboarding. Revising decks. But no one’s making real commitments.

“A long, painful POC without clear ownership is a stalling tactic, not momentum.” —Ayanle Soffé

2. Late-stage power shifts or surprises

New stakeholders appear out of nowhere. Suddenly, someone with veto power is introduced—and they want to “chat.”

“The VP promised to close. Then the COO swoops in and asks for discounts and opt-outs. Game over," says Gal Aga.

3. Disrespecting your time

Meetings are rescheduled. Emails ignored. You’re chasing someone who doesn’t value your professionalism.

4. One-sided concessions

Sudden price cuts. Extra deliverables. Opt-out clauses. If they’re still negotiating after the deal should be done, they’re testing how far you’ll bend.

“They weren’t negotiating. They were baiting," says Gal.

5. No Champion

If your main contact disappears when it matters most, you’re not closing a deal—you’re running a workshop.

“If your stakeholder can’t own the final mile, you were never really in the deal.” —Ayanle Soffé

Not every prospect deserves you

When David shared his story on LinkedIn, it touched a nerve. Because most sellers don’t walk away. They stay too long. Give too much and get burned.

We want to believe prospects are rational. Honest. Courteous.

But “A prospect can’t fail at being a prospect—because there are no rules for their behavior. Your job is to adapt," says Sandler sales guru, Benjamin Dennehy.

You owe every prospect your professionalism—but not your trust. You don’t get burned by prospects who lie. You get burned by expecting them to behave like you.

“Sales has overused and overrated this concept of partnership.” —irfan Hilal Ahmed

That’s not cynicism. That’s wisdom. The Stoics called it discernment.

Keep a Stoic mindset

The ancient Stoics would argue disappointment stems from misplaced expectations. Marcus Aurelius once wrote, “You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”

In sales, this means accepting a fact: Prospects will act act deceptively, often unpredictably. It's not in our control.

A prospect can't fail at being a prospect because there are no rules for their behavior. They can say anything or behave anyway. Your job is knowing this and changing how you interact with them accordingly.

Remember, you're just salesman, and as far as a prospect is concerned it's your job to send quotes and then chase them for an answer - they can ignore you all they want - you were stupid enough to play along.

Tough to hear but true. Don't get annoyed, get better!" says Dennehy. 

In sales, avoid:

• rewarding ghosters with second chances.
• chase maybe.
• confuse motion for momentum.

David Klasser trusted too easily.

Gal Aga saw clearly and walked.

Who do you want to be?

The problem with being helpful, kind

We are told to go above and beyond; to push our limits for the sake of customers. But at what cost? The truth is, too much kindness—when it drains your own resources, energy, and well-being—is not a virtue.

It's a path to ruin. Many have lost their way, giving so much of themselves they're left feeling empty, unappreciated and burned out.

It’s a modern-day tragedy where the best of intentions lead to the worst of outcomes.

Stoicism shows us another way—a way to be generous without losing oneself, a way to be kind but also kind to oneself. It teaches us the art of balanced generosity, ensuring our actions enrich others' lives while also safeguarding our own well-being.

Here are some hard truths, grounded in the Stoic principles and expanded by sales experts like Tom Manning and Benjamin Dennehy:

1. Not Everyone Deserves Your Help
   Prospects lie. They ghost. They exploit your expertise without intention to buy. As Tom Manning aptly advises, “Teach your salespeople to disqualify prospects rather than assume everyone deserves help.” Sellers need to shift their mindset from “winning every deal” to focusing on qualified, deserving buyers.
2. Sales Failures Are Often Self-Inflicted
   Salespeople like David sometimes fall into the trap of over-educating prospects in an effort to demonstrate value.
   
   However, as Benjamin Dennehy warns, “Educating a prospect is not a sales tactic but a weakness.” Instead of extracting information, they give it away too freely, enabling prospects—or worse, competitors masquerading as prospects—to exploit their expertise.
3. Verbal Agreements Are Worthless
   As Dermot Hamblin advises, “The better and more specific the prospect’s questions, the more likely you’re being used.” A signed contract or paid deposit must be the minimum threshold for commitment. Anything less is a gamble.
4. You’re Not Owed Courtesy
   Sales professionals often lament ghosting or abrupt rejections, but Benjamin Dennehy reminds us: “A prospect can behave however they like. It’s your job to adapt.” The sooner you detach emotionally from outcomes, the better.
5. Pipeline Is Your Best Defense
   As Dermot Hamblin puts it: “Pipeline cures all.” A strong, consistent pipeline minimizes the impact of lost deals. It allows salespeople to focus on the next opportunity instead of dwelling on losses.

What to do next

Here’s how you can apply these lessons:

1. Adopt a Defensive Stance
   Teach your sales team that their primary role is to extract information, not give it away. If a prospect is asking highly specific questions, treat it as a red flag. 
2. Set Boundaries Early
   Use upfront contracts to clarify expectations: “Before we proceed, I’ll need a signed agreement or deposit to secure your spot.”  This filters out time-wasters.
   
   "Don’t let a prospect hold your time hostage," says Rafael Zimberoff. "They don’t get a spot in line until they’ve signed. Better yet, ask for a deposit upfront—it filters out those who aren’t serious."
3. Disqualify Ruthlessly
   Ask probing questions to test a prospect’s seriousness:
   • “What problem are you hoping to solve?”
   • “Why now?”
   • “Who else is involved in this decision?”
     
     If the answers are vague or inconsistent, they’re likely not worth pursuing.
4. Don't Send Free Proposals
   "People are very ‘yes focused’ to avoid discomfort," says Lewis Thompson-Milne. "Challenge their yes and push back on their confirmation to assess its authenticity. If they’re not ready, it’s better to know sooner than later."
5. Detach Emotionally
   As Benjamin Dennehy advises, “If a prospect hasn’t responded within 72 hours, it’s over.” Move on without chasing or emotional investment.
6. Focus on Pipeline Strength
   A healthy pipeline ensures that one rejection doesn’t derail your momentum. Keep prospecting, keep qualifying, and keep moving.

You don’t get burned by prospects who lie.

You get burned by expecting them to behave like you.